In March 2012 I decided that with the year ending on 12th or 21st December 2012 whichever it wasn't, it was a good idea to convince the wife that I couldn't suffer my Mayan prophesised apocaplypse without having ridden a Ducati D16RR Desmosedici. Amazingly, she agreed! So, long story short, I part exchanged my much loved and very enhanced MH900e for a one user D16RR Team version in April, with only 3k on the clock and all parts and accessories present.

After a family day out to pick it up I had to wait a week to ride it as they hadn't taxed the bike. No problem. Ten miles into my ride it died. It wouldn't start again and my experience led me to guess at fried battery due to previously fried regulator rectifier. Seven hours waiting in the middle of the country for the AA to pull their fingers out of their proverbials and they finally sent a flat bed truck for me. It was so big you could have loaded the Ark Royal on the back.

A miserable trip home and the Desmosedici was parked in the garage to await collection by JHP to sort her out and do the next annual service, also due from the previous unnamed bike dealer it came from. Some haggling later and the aforementioned dealer paid JHP to sort the rectifier for them and back she comes.

Three months after buying the bike I went out for my first blast. This is the ultimate sports bike right? The best thing on two wheels, the pinnacle of all motorcycling road riders dreams? I confess I was nervous. 200bhp is a lot of welly and knowing a simple bump would cost thousands (seat unit £5k, wheels £10k a pair etc etc) I was concerned. The bike flew, it's a missile. I've ridden some focussed bikes in my time including grand prix two strokes but this is another level. Wanting to pass a car I blip the throttle and the horizon screams into view. I pass the car and the 18 wheeler in front before my thoughts can catch their breath. Into a 40 zone and I can't keep a constant speed, the throttle needs permanent input, there's no relaxation here. Out again on to a 60mph A road and the bike dances all over. The slightest ripple in the road lifts the front or sends the bike skipping sideways, it's a permanent fight to keep it on line even though I can't really see any road bumps; when I hit a potholed section, it's like fighting a bull rhino and I'm still at legal speeds. Finally I arrive home knackered and sweating after doing the same route I'd done 3 hours earlier on my 888 SP5 but this time without the big grin. The D16RR is so powerful, so tight, so focussed that it is an utter nightmare to ride on our normal UK roads. On billiard smooth tracks I imagine it's beyond compare but on the road, I hate it. £35 grand and I hate it. £35 grand and I part exchanged my quirky but beautiful MH900e. I was as sick as a parrot!

A few days turn into weeks and I had no inclination to ride the bike. It's beautiful to look at and to listen to albeit in an industrial agricultural assaulting kind of way but I can't have £35 grand in the garage doing nothing but being despised. So, a few phone calls later and it's up for sale.

Weeks turn into months and half a year later it's still in the dealer's window. Endless tyre kickers promise to buy but none come up with the money, understandably, it's a massive investment and even though JHP looked after me superbly well on its first out of warranty service, cost of ownership is high.

We went on holiday and sat surfing the web sat on the bog in Florida, as you do, I spy a Tricolore for sale. Not just any old Tricolore but an 851 kit. Not just any 851 kit either, the last one, number 206 of 206 complete bikes that left the factory. I emailed and asked if they fancied a part exchange laughingly. I nearly collapsed when they said they were interested! It seems another customer was selling bikes hand over fist in order to get a D16RR so it was possible. I had to wait though until I was back in the UK to talk it through and as Sir Catchcart was already talking to the seller, looking to add the last full kit 851 to his collection, I was warned it was a slim chance.

Fast forward to mid-November and I sneaked in under everyone else's nose and agreed the deal. The 851 came to me immediately and the D16RR left for safe storage pending sale to its new excited owner after the balance of cash had come my way. I was not unhappy with the deal, I lost a bit but if it concluded, I'd be back in 80's/90's Bordi territory and where I'm happy. In these recession hit times it's taken until this week to finish the deal but it has completed and true to their word the dealer has been excellent, honest, trustworthy and impeccable with communications. So my year of anguish and remorse is finally over. The D16RR has gone to a new and possibly younger more carefree home and I have a pretty special 851 to sit alongside my pretty special and eternally loved SP5.

The morale of the story? Well I guess there are many....use your head and not just your heart when buying a bike. If you can't test ride it, expect the worst when you do ride it. Just because the whole world says it's the best bike doesn't mean it's the best bike for you. If the wife questions you unusually often about the thought behind a bike purchase, give it some thought yourself, just a little? But perhaps for me at my age and with my bike history, trust your instinct in knowing what you like and stick close to it.

It could have been a lot worse, I came out of this year of uncertainty very well. The 851 is original condition, not perfect but it is correct and complete and I can work on the imperfections in my own time, happy as a pig in muck doing so. So ladies and gents, I'd like to introduce the grand old girl to you...here she is 851 KIT #206...I'm a happy man again 😄